Following the successful lead of the Hobby Airport Bath House District, other BHD boards have announced new monthly meetings open to all members of the public who don't mind their faces shown on local television...After noting an increase in revenue and an improved lifestyle for board members after implementing open meetings, other area BHD boards decided to make the change...
In the model set by the Hobby Airport BHD, citizens are welcome to bring their complaints, suggestions and bribes to board meetings for immediate consideration...Although the record shows most suggestions are ignored, and complaints usually result in the arrest of the complainant, not a single bribe or special favor has been turned away by board members...
Presiding officer Dewey Cheatham has been especially rewarded in his efforts to grant new business licenses to newcomers interested in bringing employment opportunities to the district...He invites applications for diverse enterprises such as massage parlors, nudie bars and older professions such as gambling and smuggling...
He cited the recent case of newly arrived immigrant, Yugo Leftanescu, an East European who had opened an oddsmaking office on a local barstool...Cheatham took a special interest since he was raised as an an orphan like Leftanescu...
On questioning it was learned that Yugo Leftanescu was named after the car in which he was born, just minutes before his mother abandoned him for a lesbian girlfriend...He was raised in a convent where the nuns had taken vows of celibacy and nudism...
Always respectful of the teachings of the nuns that marriage is a desirable goal, Leftanescu wears a wedding dress as his everyday garb...Shown below is a still capture from the under-the-table cam showing Leftanescu handing in his business application to Cheatham...
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