The latest trend towards equality begun by famed politician, Hillary Clinton, on her inspection tour of lesbian bath houses has caused a furor among fashion designers and boutique operators...During her extended trip through the Hobby Airport Bath House & Poofter Emporium, a quick glance through the unisex reception area on her way to the lesbian facilities revealed an alarming detail...
Her keen eye noticed that some of the male poofters wore trap-door underwear for easy access, while the lesbian clientele wore undies with no similar advantage...Upon talking with RHM, proprietor of the successful male lingerie boutique on the premises, it was revealed that the obvious inequality issue had never risen...
Having a few extra yards of pink flannel, RHM designed a trap-door variation of the former first lady's favored "granny-pantie" style on the spot, and after a personal fitting she ordered Congress to mandate the new style in all poofter/lesbo outlets while banning further use of non-trap-door underclothing...RHM promised compliance, but immediately saw design problems with the popular thong and g-string fashions preferred by lesbians and towel boys...
The new layer of government created to oversee compliance sent federal underwear inspectors to approve any new designs, and couturiers like RHM found that any new fashions without an adequate trap door were considered non-compliant and rejected...RHM was in a panic over lost sales and fear of a government takeover until his brother, towel boy Lefty, stopped in to light his cigar on his way to the men's room...
Lefty's only thong was in the laundry for a deep cleaning following his extra helping of Frito ® Brand bean dip on his Taco Bell lunch, and he was wearing only a jock strap purloined from a client's locker...RHM theorized that the simple addition of a drawstring to the garment could open or close the two cheek supports providing either quick access or the appearance of a thong as the wearer desired...
The resulting fashion innovation has taken the poofter world by storm after gaining approval of the Federal Underwear & Foundation Administration (FUFA), and sales are reported strong in bath house boutiques nationwide...Pictured below, spokesmodel Lefty demonstrates the freedom of movement found in the prototype design...
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