A surprise announcement today ended weeks of speculation over the whereabouts of Kim Jong-un, leader of North Korea...Dr. Tchytz, of the Braniff Street Gender Reassignment Clinic & Bait Shop, said in a press conference that Kim (who now prefers to be called "Kimmie") is recovering successfully, and undergoing therapy to be able to walk in high heels...
Even "Kimmie's" close friend and advisor, towel boy Lef Ti of the Beijing People's Poofter Collective, was stunned by the announcement...Lef Ti is quoted as saying, "I know fat sissy boy like to wear dress, and always be on bottom, but I not expect this"...
"Kimmie" will make her/his/its debut tonight at a coming out party being held in the Grand Ball Room of the Hobby Airport Bath House & Poofter Emporium...Doorman Big "Tiny" Balsac joked, "I don't know if we can allow Kim in the "ball" room again since he, I mean she, doesn't have them anymore, but we'll make an exception in the interest of international peace"...
Dr. Tchytz assured all followers that the surgery went according to plan, and advance tickets to the coming out party were available from clerk Lefty in the bait shop side of the clinic...Lefty added that he just got in a very small quantity of rare North Korean worm and stinkbait for those late-season sportsmen going after sand sharks...
"Kimmie's" date tonight is said to be long time companion, former NBA star Dennis Rodman who is pictured below in formal wear, and said to be hoping for North Korea to lift restrictions on same-sex marriages...
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