As off-duty midget, lesbian Deputy Dumpy Bunny reported to her part-time security guard job at the Hobby Airport Bath House & Poofter Emporium, the employees and clients stopped to stare in open-mouthed wonder...It seemed her entire hairdo had shifted to one side, coincidentally exposing her oddly misshapen head...
When asked about it, the deputy, formerly of Montgomery County Precinct 0 and now on permanent assignment to the Hobby Airport Poofter Police, became noticeably agitated as her normally squeaky, annoying voice rose to a level that could shatter glass..."I don't want to talk about it!" she whined...
Left to her duty plugging peepholes from the towel boys' locker room into the nudist lesbians yoga classroom, her oldest son, a perpetual student and part-time lawn maintenance technician, arrived with her forgotten lunch sack...Pressed for details, but fearful of raising the anger of his mother, he explained that there was a minor altercation where his mother gets her hair cut, then he hurriedly left...
Later, after being offered a McDonald's Diet Coke which sometimes calms her down, the deputy revealed that she ordinarily gets her hair cut by a transvestite parolee who performs community service as a hairdresser in the city jail lobby...The midget deputy, who always brings her own booster chair to the shop, was in the middle of her haircut when a warrant officer arrived to revoke the parolee's probation...
He agreed to wait until the current haircut was complete, but the nervous parolee had broken one of his/her 4" heels, and was forced to stand at an awkward angle to finish the job...The result was a hairdo that even Vidal Sassoon couldn't fix on his best day...
The off-kilter coiffure caused the deputy's hat to be tilted at a jaunty angle reminding others of Claude Rains in "Casablanca" although his mustache was smaller...She also still refuses to acknowledge that she sometimes wears a hairpiece to cover a bald spot, although one was found in her locker...
Seen below is a visiting barber college student attempting to lessen the damage by "evening it up"...
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