Monday, September 29, 2014

Man eats own hip, calls it fart...

http://www.usatoday.com/story/news/world/2014/05/26/newser-man-eats-hip/9593153/

"A Norwegian art student says the deformed hip that caused him a lifetime of pain became something much more pleasant when boiled and served with potatoes, but caused severe and uncontrollable flatulence..."

The student said he followed specific instructions from world renowned Norwegian culinary expert and international fugitive, Ifar Toften, but now believes he may have misinterpreted Chef Toften's advice due to a linguistic difference between northern and southern Norwegian dialects...According to Dr. RHM of the Parkmyfjord Bath House & School of Languages, Chef Toften speaks southern Norwegian with a distinct lisp which the student poofter may have misunderstood...

Chef Toften meant to say, "If you want your bone to look larger, stuff a russet potato between your hips"...The student, using the popular Poofter Translator app on his IPhone thought he said, "Cut out your hip bone and boil it with potatoes"...

Dr. RHM, developer of the IPhone app, blamed an incompetent lab assistant named Lefty, and apologized for any inconvenience or incontinence...

"Now he tells me" said the one-legged transgendered poofter (below)...


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