Current affairs correspondent Dan files this brief, "Truckman has not been seen at any of his usual locations...Police are searching the adhesives aisles in local Home Depots, senior buffets in Luby's Cafeterias and all known nudist camp peepholes...
Fowl play is not suspected as Truckman doesn't like chicken...Lefty surmises, "The old dude's in jail; he got married; or the Federales caught him smuggling guns into Patton Village."
Update: Truckman advises us through one of his nieces and dietitian, "Lefty always gets it wrong...I was once sentenced to marriage in jail for smuggling guns out of Patton Village...If Lefty had anything worth taking, I'd sue him..."
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