Officials say they are hours, perhaps days away from sounding the all-clear signal as a mysterious, malingering odor has permeated the Hobby Airport area, forcing the evacuation of at least a hundred homos from the popular bath house district...First reports indicate the malodorous aroma first surfaced as a bath house towel boy returned from his scheduled lunch break...
As the towel boy (identified only as "Lefty" to protect his identity) clocked in from lunch at the Hobby Airport Bath House & Poofter Emporium, doorman Big "Tiny" Balsac reported feeling ill and asked to be seen by the house physician, Dr. Tchytz...As the incident seemed to center on the hot tub locker room, Dr. Tchytz ordered an immediate quarantine, effectively trapping several bathers in the same room with Lefty and senior men's room attendant, RHM...
Dr. Tchytz also ordered the evacuation of the entire neighborhood in order to prevent a bigger disaster...However, an elderly, eccentric retired civil engineer refused to leave until he had finished downloading a skidloader porn video from the Dave Grubb tractor pornography website...He then became enraged when a KHOU mobile news unit erected its broadcast antenna between his Braniff Street mansion and the home of his neighbor, Ted, somehow blocking his wifi reception...
At this time, Hobby Airport SWAT units have the home surrounded and are trying to negotiate a peaceful settlement through his daughter who insists the VA clinic must have switched his prescriptions again...
As of this writing, the famed legal team of Mr. C.N. Spitt, Esq. and the Cascade Kitchen Counselor are preparing a class action lawsuit against the city on behalf of the displaced poofters, most of whom stated they couldn't tell a difference between the bath house steam room and the regular Houston humidity outdoors...
Houston's lesbo Mayor Parker, seeking to lessen the political damage, ordered the Obama wind turbines waiting for shipment at the ship channel, to immediately begin pumping the relatively better air from Houston's Turning Basin and the Pasadena chemical plants to displace the fouler air emanating from the bath house locker room...She will also permit the gay frolickers who were forced outdoors to remain nude until the situation is resolved...
Shown below, ship channel wind turbines churn 24 hours per day to freshen the Hobby Airport area atmosphere...
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