Like most bath house employees, Lefty looks forward to his holidays, but when the Hobby Airport Bath House & Poofter Emporium ordered him and his brother, RHM, to open the Poofter Boutique on Thanksgiving for early Black Friday shoppers, he refused...Traditionally Lefty plays the part of the stuffed turkey (without dressing) in the annual Montrose Lesbian Turkey Parade, and told his poofter bosses that the happy faces of the lesbians in the street orgy were more important than his job...
Management responded by firing the two brothers, but under pressure from the wealthy gay clientele of the bath house, they later relented and re-hired both Lefty and RHM...The good news became a moot point for Lefty as he was arrested on pickpocket charges by an undercover midget lesbian detective from Montgomery County's Precinct 0, who walked in the parade dressed only in body paint...
The detective, identified only as Deputy Dumpy Bunny, felt a hand between two rolls of belly fat where she kept her badge and gun, and immediately handcuffed Lefty who was clad only in turkey feathers...The parade audience, who are accustomed to handcuff play while frolicking, thought it was part of the act and cheered wildly...Lefty later claimed at his arraignment that he was merely trying to touch up the detective's paint costume with a french tickler he mistakenly thought was a paintbrush...
Lefty's holiday is sure to be an active one as he is now housed with fifty male inmates who had many comments on his "gobbler garments" as he was led into their cell...His bail hearing is scheduled after the holiday season as all judges seem to be unavailable due to vacation scheduling...
Update: Following Lefty's arrest, RHM passed the hat (which is all he was wearing) among the bath house poofters and collected $4.74 plus some watch batteries and buttons for Lefty's bail...He added this to his money from Coke bottle returns and shoe shines and had almost ten dollars...Ordinarily this would not be enough for bail, but a liberal lesbian traffic court judge heard about Lefty's plight and set the bail at $10.00...
RHM would have made it to the bond window at the courthouse, but started watching a Felix the Cat marathon on the Cartoon Network, and missed the deadline...Fortunately for Lefty, the judge released him to her custody under house arrest (her house) where he will work off the bail and fine by instructing the judge's nude pilates class plus other unspecified services...
Alert news photographer Dan captured the scene in the photo below moments before the detective made the arrest...
No comments:
Post a Comment
Comments are welcome...Malicious messages and spam attempts will be removed...Keep it clean and let's have fun...