Lefty's pledge...

Lefty has been called to Washington to show his solidarity with President Obama...Since Obama has pledged to return 5% of his salary to the cash-starved US Treasury, Lefty has pledged to return 5% of the money, jewelry and cigarette butts he pilfers from the Hobby Airport Bath House & Poofter Emporium back to its source...So far, all his returns have been deposited in the towel boys' tip jar which he also pilfers...

As Lefty says, "It's the thought that counts"...

Update: The following has been reported by reader Dan: "Lefty showed his solidarity to President Obama, but unfortunately he showed too much and the Secret Service arrested him for indecent exposure."

Editor's note: As we understand it, they were both showing their solidarity to each other when an overzealous congressional men's room attendant opened the stall door...Being a disgruntled Nixon supporter, he called in the Metro Toilet Police who had no choice but file affidavits on both...

Obama, claiming executive washroom privilege, was never charged...Lefty, on the other hand, was forced to call in high-powered DC barrister, Mr. C.N. Spitt, Esq...Mr. Spitt, having previously cleared himself of witness pampering charges in the Beechnut vs. Copenhagen case, had Lefty's original charges of sodomy reduced to following too closely...

In an effort to show his gratitude (not to mention his more private parts), Lefty has volunteered as towel boy in Spitt's on-premises bath house at his palatial Alabama pig farm estate on a pro boner basis...The pigs are said to have filed their own injunctions as a result...

Pictured below is the toll booth outside the White House pay toilet...

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