Lefty, under the mistaken belief that Hawaii permits same- sex/cross- species marriages, has booked airline seats for himself and his shetland pony to Honolulu, thinking they will be granted a marriage license...Lefty was quoted as saying, "Hey, they issued Barack Obama a birth certificate even though he was born in Kenya; why shouldn't they let me and Trixie get married?"...
The couple's honeymoon plans include a cruise to the Grand Gayman Islands...
Wedding reporter Dan has filed this update, "Lefty, upon interrogation, and fumigation, by the authorities, now states he was just "horsing around" with his Shetland pony, who, by the way, is gay. The authorities have dropped all charges, including dropping their pants to compare notes/whatever with Lefty."
Update: Authorities were mainly concerned with charges of the pony being underage, but Lefty produced an Illinois birth certificate signed by then-governor Rod Blagojevich, and also pointed out the horse is a miniature breed and only looks too young...
The happy couple is shown below in their wedding photo...
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